Put on a hat and she is just him. "Violations of a sense of humor in schizophrenia and affective disorders

Thought in patients with schizophrenia is violated on another principle - they make generalizations for some implicit signs.
Drawing of schizophrenia patient

Every year, 8 million citizens appeal for psychiatric assistance in Russia. 3% of the population suffer from depression and 1% - schizophrenia. In neighboring China, the situation is even more intense: schizotypic disorders are found in more than 4 million Chinese. And at the same time there is still no satisfactory, generally accepted by all scientists and doctors of the definition, what is schizophrenia. That is why any new studies bringing us to the solo chain of this mental illness are so valuable. Especially if this study is very unexpected, "violations of a sense of humor in schizophrenia and affective disorders." Such work was performed at the Department of Neuro- and Pathopsychology of the Faculty of Psychology of Moscow State University. M.V. Lomonosov. About this - conversation with the author of the study by a candidate psychological Sciences Alena Ivanova.

- Alena Mikhailovna, and from which determination of schizophrenic disorders you proceeded, starting to study such an intriguing topic, as "violations of a sense of humor in schizophrenia and affective disorders"?

- It is very typical that the first question you asked about is not what humor is, but what is schizophrenia. It is very significant: what about humor to ask - and so everything is clear! Everyone about humor has its own idea.

- Isn't it?

"Indeed, every self-respecting philosopher, starting with ancient times, something about humor yes said." Traditionally, it is customary to learn humor in linguistics, literature. But experimental science is interested in humor relatively recently. This applies not only to psychology, but also, for example, to applied linguistics, or research of artificial intelligence. Comic, humor is gradually allocated to an independent subject of study, as evidenced by the emergence of thematic associations, such as the American Humor Studies Association and International Society for Humor Studies.

- And yet, if you consider that, according to expert estimates, only in Russia almost one and a half million people suffer from schizophrenic disorders, my first question is quite acquitted.

- You correctly noticed that some single clear look at what such schizophrenia is not, although there are a lot of classifications for its forms. Three groups of patients participated in my research: patients with sluggish and parietal schizophrenia, as well as affective disorders.

In domestic psychiatry, there is a low-armredient, or sluggish, schizophrenia, in contrast to heavier forms. Low-trotient means slowly progressive; That is, the sluggish schizophrenia is limited to mental violations, as a rule, not reaching the stage of pronounced psychosis. Predictive-predatory schizophrenia is one of the heaviever form of disorder, the most vivid manifestations of which are psychotic phenomena: nonsense and hallucinations.

Patients with affective disorders are patients with depression or, on the contrary, manical patients.

In patients with schizophrenia, any form always detect specific impairment of thinking. But this does not mean that they are stupid. On the contrary, patients who participated in my studies were very smart - for example, students of philosophical and mathematical faculties, translators. These are specific impairment of thinking, which can lead to a specific perception of humor.

- Please clarify. It turns out that with various schizophrenia forms, you can study philosophy and mathematics?

- Of course, there is no contradiction in this. With sluggish schizophrenia, in general, there are often no restrictions. But with rude shapes of schizophrenia it is quite real. The fact is that schizophrenia does not violate the formal logic. On the contrary, formal logic can even be developed better in these patients┘ thinking in schizophrenia patients is violated on another principle. This is called "distortion of the processes of generalization." That is, they make generalizations for some implicit signs.

Characteristic example. Sorry Schizophrenia offer compare different concepts - What is in common, that different. And the patient says that the boots and pencil are very similar to the subjects. From an ordinary point of view, this is very distant concepts. But the patient is surprised: "How! And the other can be written something: a pencil - on a sheet of paper, my shoe is on the sand. "

This kind of thinking is in principle correctly. From the point of view of formal logic, everything is right! And schizophrenia patients, making generalizations, rely on these criteria. By the way, due to this, there is a rapprochement of schizophrenia with genius, because creativity is also based on some unexpected generalizations, the generation of some unusual metaphor.

It is believed that patients with schizophrenia for the same mechanism violates the perception of comic, humor. They are jokes related to the union of distant concepts. There is even such an opinion that there are especially intellectual jokes - now we have all sorts of advertising posters: when completely different concepts are combined and humor is built on this, - invent patients with schizophrenia. But, nevertheless, healthy people can appreciate it.

- Immediately draws such a picture in the style of Cyberpunk: schizophrenia sicks are sitting in nutritional basements or, on the contrary, in high-altitude offices of advertising firms and complain advertising slogans, which we read ...

"I can only say that not all schizophrenia patients are in clinics, their very large number works, and quite successfully.

- But after all, the phrase was already a banality: "Laughter, a sense of humor is a sign of mental health." And you, it means, engaged in the study of humor in people are not entirely mentally healthy. Is there any contradictions here?

- whether humor is a sign of mental health - this question is now actively discussed on very serious scientific level. it big topic. It is performed by a lot of experimental and theoretical works. These works go to the field of physiology, associated with immunity (there is a hypothesis that laughter increases the body's immune status), with psychic diseases, with psychotherapy. Summarizing the conclusion that scientists do in latelyIt is that not all humor is a healthy humor. There is a positive humor, adaptive. And there are forms of humor, which, on the contrary, are destructive, dezadapive - for example, aggressive, the so-called sarcastic humor.

But, no matter how paradoxically, the studies of the sense of humor in mentally ill people are practically no. In our country, as far as I know, my work is not the first study. And in the world, this direction is just beginning to develop. Meanwhile, it is very interesting with different points vision.

In my research, for example, it turned out such a very useful for the diagnosis of a thing: with rough forms of schizophrenia, the recognition of humor is violated. We presented a sick phrase - mixed: humorous and uniamondic. It turned out that healthy subjects, patients with affective disorders and patients with sluggish schizophrenia easily allocated, where humor, and where not humor (no matter, like a joke or not). And only patients with parotid-progressional schizophrenia have experienced difficulties with the recognition of jokes. And this allows you to highlight this group of patients and diagnose.

Reaction - laughter or smile - means that a person appreciated your joke. This is a matter of taste first. And in our studies it was about recognizing humor. You may not like this or another joke or anecdote, but you realized that the interlocutor joked. Another thing is that humor is very diverse. This is already a subtle nuance. There are half-one statements, and the like.

- And there is still "idiotic laughter" ┘

- Idiotic laughter, generally speaking, not always connected with humor. It can and without humor arise - a funny gas or marijuana therefore there is a certain blurred border, where and a healthy person can not always determine - this is said with humor or not.

In our study, we talked about a clearer humor, more unequivocal. That humor, which is all subjects - and healthy, and patients with affective disorders - determined exactly as humor. But schizophrenia patients did not cope with this task.

Once again it was confirmed that patients with depression appreciate humor, but they decrease laughter activity, external emotional manifestations.

We tried to reveal what kinds of humor are different patients prefer, and what, on the contrary, avoid. As a result, it was possible to single out five kinds of humor, which were divided by our patients.

First, humor of absurdity. These are jokes that are found not so much on intellectual effort, but on the absurdity of the situation itself. The perception of such a humor is more connected with the emotional component. My most favorite joke from this series: "I bought a man's hat, and she just". There is no special relationship to the humor of absurdity in schizophrenia patients.

The opposite of the yumor of absurdity is humor associated with the span. We called this kind of contradiction resolution humor. It is similar to the perception of mysteries. And this humor is just especially preferred by schizophrenia patients. And the more expressed impaired thinking, the more they like this humor. Most likely they themselves and invent such jokes in large quantities. Here is an example: "What are drinking today? - Yes, the wine is dry. - Well, smear! " Here is purely linguistic ambiguity.

As for affective patients, they love the specific humor - we called it cynical and pessimistic. It reflects a cynical, depressive view of the world: everything is bad, everything will be worse. But nevertheless, this is also humor. For example: "It is worth finding a person closer - I want to send it away." Or: "Doctor says to the patient: I have bad news for you. Patient: I die? Doctor: We will treat you. "

If we talk about manic patients, then this group showed very interesting patterns in the perception of comical. On the one hand, by definition, they love to laugh very much, all the time are in a state of euphoria. Nevertheless, it is believed that the manic state is protective: in the background, at the level of the subconscious, there is depression. And here the manic patients most and appreciated this particular, depressive humor.

- It turns out: I saw a merry man on the street - go around!

- In general, affective patients with me caused a sea of \u200b\u200bemotions while I conducted a study. They are completely unpredictable. But it was believed that depressive patients do not laugh at all, do not react to humor. It turned out that this is not so, it is categorically wrong! I presented depressed sick jokes for reading. It happened that while such a patient reads a joke - he laughs. But as soon as he finished reading, he has a facial expression, which is called, "slips", and he returns to his depressive state. Or vice versa. I had a manic patient who laughed all the time while I communicated with him, completely without reason. In addition to those moments when he read a joke. He came to jokes seriously.

- So, we got to the fourth view of humor.

- This is indecent humor. This kind of humor is not very complaining, ignore even patients with depression. The same thing - with sluggish schizophrenia.

- And how can these results be interpreted?

- when depressed decreases the level of expansion into the world, the person closes from everything from all. And the perception of indecent jokes is still connected with some outrage: that's what an anecdote I told!

In patients with sluggish schizophrenia, such a reaction to indecent humor is also connected also with depression. The fact is that schizophrenia patients who are in the clinic are lying there very often with depression complaints. Interestingly, the more depression, the less fond of indecent humor.

Fifth view of humor. It was conditionally designated as humor, discriminating the opposite sex. Example. "What is the difference between women and mosquitoes? Mosquitoes annoy only in the summer. "

Analyzing these jokes, I realized that, despite the discriminatory, aggressive nature, their goal is rather flirting, the establishment of relations between the floors than aggression and isolation. Interestingly, too "black" anecdote ("she was perfectly folded, although right hand Top from the suitcase ") received a negative burden on this factor. Paradoxical moment!

Therefore, in depressive patients, this humor is less likely, they are not configured to any relationship. And with the strengthening of thinking violations, schizophrenia patients, on the contrary, begin to love this kind of humor. Because such humor is more catchy; Aggression is not so thin humor, it is a deliberable manifestation of their intentions. For patients with an approached-progressive form of schizophrenia, aggression may be a sign of a joke. And even the most typical schizophrenic humor of the resolution of the contradiction is also associated with aggression: when we tell someone's intellectual anecdote, we will measure intellect with the enemy - will understand, it comes to him?

We asked such patients to joke. So, it turned out that they had all the jokes were very aggressive, and some did not contain any humor at all, it was pure aggression. True, while it is not at the level of scientific results, but at the observation level.

- I listen to you, and all the time comes to the memory of the statement of Freud: "Humanity always laughs at three things: sex, departures of the rectum and over its government"

- You know similar studies with the factorization of the estimates of jokes, but the Swiss scientist Willibald Ruh was held on healthy people. There are, of course, some nuances, but in general, three factors coincide: humor of absurdity; Humor resolution contradiction and sexy humor. (In our studies, it turned out not sexy, but indecent humor: it was not only about sex.)

But when connected to this sample, patients with tests occur two additional factors - Cynic and depressive humor and humor, discriminatory opposite sex. That is for healthy people The last two factors do not play a noticeable role when evaluating, for example, a joke.

And this fact is very important for diagnosis. Cynical humor prefer depressive and manic patients, and humor, discriminating the opposite floor, are patients with schizotypic impairedness of thinking. But in patients with schizophrenia can also be depression and impairment of thinking.

If you manage to come up with a working technique based on the perception of humor, it will provide an opportunity to diagnose the structure of the defect. After all, the patient's financial status is very important for the doctor: what's in this moment It prevails, for which it is necessary, first of all, pay attention to - on impaired thinking or depressive condition.

The story is odenth

I studied at the institute one student. Called him Vanya. Actually, in fact, he was Andrei, but for some reason Vanya appealed to him. And he so bother with this, and he himself forgot himself, as his name is actually, and seemed to be all his new name, and the old one did not mention at all.
So, Vanya loved the jokes very much. He had one, who was beloved, who he told everyone with each other case. He sounded like this:
- I bought a man with a hat, and she just.
Having heard anecdote and those who, thus, the dose of humor, having lost them, have invariably shrugged and asked:
- Well?
Vanya condescendingly explained:
- What is the hat put on?
- on the head.
-Well? - With a victorious view, Vanya looked at the interlocutor.
- What? - did not understand the one.
- Did you get?
- Not.
Vanya again impatiently repeated anecdote:
- Well, I bought a man hat.
- Well? - Caught his interlocutor. - Further!
- And she just. Just understand? Just she!
- So what?
- Well, what's the hat put on?
- on the head.
- Well?
- What?
Seeing that the conversation turns on the 2nd round, Vanya hopelessly waved his hand and left, leaving the interlocutor in some perplexity, which, after all, he meant.
Once, Vanya himself was lucky to become the hero of his favorite history.
In the young years he was not alien to some Frances and tried, if possible, dress stylishly. Once it was drawn up in a long raincoat and a wide-grade elegant green hat in retro style, with its shadow, personifying fashion 30s.
Where, in what depths of the grandmother's wardrobe, he found this rarity, I did not say Vanya. He fairly believed that his hat, in his own way, is unique that such a style will not meet anywhere in the street, and therefore it is dressed quite original, and ... calculated.
At one of the metro stations to the train, in which we drove, entered poorly dressed, an ancient old man. Its outfit to be exactly the wardrobe's Vanin (including Vanina pride - his stylish hat), with the only difference, as the raincoat, and the former once, 50 years ago, the fashionable headdress was until the impossibility of torn and dirty.
Apparently, the old man, as a result of poverty, simply did not have another clothes, and he continued to wear it, without taking off, from the same time when she was bought. Contrast with a complete similarity of the Leson, however, it was stripped. Vanya with dignity looked at the old man's outfit, incl. And his hat with witch fields.
"It's stuffed," he said through his teeth.
We took away with laughter.
More in a raincoat, nor in his wonderful hat, we did not see Vanya - he began to dress, like most of us, in a jacket and jeans. In the future, he also cooled to clothes at all, providing Fashion with young girls, as, however, and their milfs, for everyone knows that the ladies' passion for outhouses does not have age.
***
Only, after many years, the mysterious Vanin Anecdote about the hat found the meaning of my mouth junior Son Stepa (baby mouth ...?). He accidentally heard this joke and said:
- And I thought this story about Boyarsky.
- Why about Boyarsky? - We were surprised.
- Well, how did you buy a boyars hat, and she just got him!

Treloni - Hermione:
- You do not have anything that is necessary for the noble art of privacy!
- Perfectly! My patience burst. I'm leaving.
Treloni makes Lavender sign, and that Hermione's back removes the staircase from Luke. Treloni:
- I have not had disciples that would have seen the future so badly ...
Hermione is trying to get out through the hatch, does not notice that there are no stairs, and the squeal falls.
Treloni:
- and the present.
The cry of Hermione is heard below: "Damn !!! What was it?!"
Treloni:
- And the past.

Hagrid lived near Hogwarts in a house with the inscription "Strying X ..."

In Hogwarts are waiting for the Ministerial Commission. Dumbledore gives all instructions:
-And most importantly, whatever happens, pretend that it should be.
And now the Commission comes. Professor with Ambridge on the corridor, suddenly, from the toilet, Vasilisk crawls, and on it - Voldemort. Voldemort swears with a wand, Karry Potter kills Avad. Minerva looks at the clock:
- Exactly noon. Everything is exactly your plan, director Dumbledore.

Snape from the headquarters of Lord Schlock owl Dumbledore in Hogwarts:
"Voldemort transfers the offensive on Hogwarts a month ahead. I am glad that everything in school finally will be preworn."
Dumbledore Schlet Snape Answer:
"Severus, check: on what syllable do you put the emphasis in the last word?"

Bill says Madame Pomfrie:
- I was bitten by the werewolf!
Pomfrey, agitated:
- You need to make an injection in the stomach!
Bill:
- Syringe?
Nearby Snape, melancholy:
- Silver cool ...

The first chapter "Gifts of Death". The estate of Malfoev, Voldemort kills Chariti Berbage.
Narcissa is imperceptibly pushing in Lucius side:
- Look at our son. See what my face is?
- Yes.
- I want myself a dress of the same green color.

"Dear Madame Malkin,
Due to the fact that I was appointed Minister of Magic, I ask you to send me a mantle strict style.
Sincerely: Rufus Schreger.
"Dear Sir,
I congratulate you on the appointment and send the strict one of the available mantles. It is really very strict and for the slightest speck gives a sleeve in the face.
Sincerely: Madame Malkin. "

Snape cooks some potion. Nearby is Harry, who came to work.
Snape (Surovo):
- Try one of these two potions!
Harry scratches in the back of the head and drinks the first thing.
- I tried.
- You do not feel anything?
- Nothing.
- At all?
- at all.
- Hmm ... then shook the inscription "poison" to the second flask.

Cuckoo-cuckoo, how long can I live?
- Ku-ku! Ku-ku! Ku ... Flammel, bastard, again you? !!!

Snape - Harry Potter, with the next healing:
- drink poison, creature! Ugh! I wanted to say: "drink a decoction of herbs."

Volan de Mort - the Reddlu-senior:
- I will ask, the chins are higher! Head slightly right! Holders Expand! We look here. Like this. Excellent! Avada Kedavra!

News in the "Prophet" of August 1, 1997:
"Yesterday, during the operation," Seven Potterov "Alastor Gryum died in nicknamed the Terrible Eye, one of the members of the Phoenix Order and the right hand of Albus Dumbledore. This is the third right hand of Albus Dumbledore, lost for the course of the second war with a dark lord."

Axioma from Alastor Grumum: - If something looks like a duck, swims like a duck, flies like a duck, shakes like a duck, taste like a duck, then it's ... Anyway Eater!

Talking two oops:
- Is the chef already alive?
- Not yet.

Hermione dreams of a nightmare. As if at the meeting of the Slap, Voldemort gets up and says:
- And now Hermione, my faithful right hand will make a report on new ways of destroying Magls, and then tell about the modifications of the Cruciatus and Avad enhanced it!
And she is not ready ...

Do you know that…
In order to preserve the giant squid in Hogwarts, it is forbidden to drink beer.

Dumbledore is divided with Ferge.
- You know, finally a complete unanimous school has been achieved at school. Even between Gryffindor and Slytherin!
- What is it like?
"Yes, Snape here on Dada asked an essay: Grinds:" How would I catch Lucius Malfoy, "Slytherins -" No matter how I helped Lucius Malfoy. " And all it ended with the same phrase!
- What is the same?
- "And hell would prove it!"

"And I'm more and more often noting that I as if someone replaced ..."
© Mad-Eye Moody

Voldemort (thoughtfully):
- I found a senior wand. I took her from the grave of the owner against his will. I killed her last owner, Severus Snape. Why doesn't she work?
Harry (with a mockery):
-Why-why. Because you did not remove it from the fuse.

Hogwarts express rides. In the first coupe, two students from Hogwarts are sitting with IQ \u003d 200:
-And yesterday the experiment added to the funny potion three ounces of an impaired daisy, collected at the third phase of the moon - you imagine, some side effects disappeared like the need to sing in the whole voice!
In the second coupe, two student with IQ \u003d 160:
- Do you make five exceptions to the Gamba law about elementary transformations? What is a shame that it is impossible to transfigure food from the air ...
In the third coupe, two students with IQ \u003d 120:
-How yesterday's match with Slytherins? As they jumped over Sedrik, where only Madame trick looked ...
In the fourth coupe, two student with IQ \u003d 80:
-How, what is it for the cakes, after which we wanted to make it so much? So, hear, it came to me: this dirty Greinger snapped them!
Two more students in the fifth coupe:
-So, did you really swelled your puppy? Cool !!

"I am a little man!" - said Professor Flitvik and beat below the belt.

Madame Pins breaks down to Dumbledore:
- The director, in our reading room, Voldemort!
Dumbledore (with interest):
-And what reads?

Sirius Black falls with one of Hogwarts towers:
- Derzh-I-Ite M-E-ENA, I am pre-esto-y-kind !!!

Sits Narcissus Malfoy with sour mine on her face. Suitable to her Lucius:
-Dear, what's wrong with you?
- I need to me, Lucius, oh how ashamed ...
-And what happened?
- Blaise Zabini 7 times already invited me to the funeral of her husband ... and I never ...

Tom Reddle and Vasilisk in the secret room. Basilisk:
-Howers, I am poisonous?
Reddle:
-U.
-Highly?
-Highly!
- Well, all, n @ *% of the ec, I bit myself tongue!

Professor Severus Snape loved the potions, logic and holidays. Therefore, waking up after a rapid party with a buzzing head, red eyes and shaking hands, Harry Potter knew for sure that he was expected on the bedside table near the bed and the yellowed parchment on which it was written: "The brine is not woven from the end of the flask and not in Middle. Sulfuric acid is not right. Tsarist vodka is not near the blue acid. Two of these statements are false. With good morning, Mr. Potter! "

From the Diary Potteromanka:
July, 12. He read fan fiction about Ron and Hermione. Three hours crying.
July 13. I read fanfic about Malfoy. Afternoon cried.
the 14 th of July. I read fanfic about the childhood of Voldemort. Cried all day.
July 15. I read fanfic about Snape. Cried all day and all night. Almost died of tears.
July 16. I bought a sixth book. I read ...
July 17th. Better B I died on Friday!

Birthday Pance Parkinson.
Goyle: "Well, I'm behind the flowers!"
Krebb: "Then I'm behind Ovens!"
Zabini: "Well, and I'm behind the cake!"
Malfoy: "And I will not stay alone with her too!"

Snape completely clogged: and Lord needs to please, and Dumbledore, and someone from Gryffindors to suffer at school ... And once in the morning I wrote a plan of action for the day (I decided that it would be easier):
1. Perform a slight order of Voldemort.
2. To convince Dumbledore that everything goes according to plan and welcome.
3. Remove glasses from Gryffindor.
Evening. Tired Snape writes a note by Lord:
"My Lord, I assure you, good wins by anything! I send the glasses of Dumbledore, just with him removed!"

Snape wrote a fic. Heroes of Darkness, Ranking - Covenant, Genre - PWP, Peyring - Everyone with everyone, and beetted, and slam, plus to everything - BDSM, beauty, necrophilia and all possible and impossible perversions ...
Last phrase fika:
"And beautiful and crystal clean soul And the body, Professor Snape Goredely looked at the cracked madness and rejoiced that he was above all this. "

Professor Snape, I congratulate you on the day of birth and I wish the whole of myself!
- Thank you, Mr. Potter! And after all, no one congratulated me, no bastard, besides you!

He meets somehow Harry Remus Lupine, drunk to live.
- Remus? Are you?
Lupine, proudly:
- Valled, howling and we will throw out!

Guilder Lockhart is Lucius Malfoy, taking antidepressants.

Mundungus comes to join the Order of Phoenix. He is told:
- So simply do not accept! Here you are leaflets, spread - take it.
There is no his day, two, three ... Finally comes.
- Why so long?
Mundungus, pulling out a pack of money out of his pocket:
- Well, and the fellowship you snapped me!

Voldemort: I did not understand to the end, as it happened. Perhaps something was copied and moved, now it does not matter. The main thing is that you are my chorquer.
Harry: Congratulations.
Voldemort: nothing with.

Harry: - I do not understand, sir, why do you always answer the question about the question?
Dumbledore: - What's this?
Harry: - Well, here again!
Dumbledore: - What is again?

The best way Organize panic in Hogwarts - ask to Slytherin to keep calm.

Having done in the living room, Harry causes Rona just in tears.
- What is the prayer, how much are you crying?
- You see, I wrote a letter to the tributers with the first money to make me money for a new magic wand ...
- Hassed, they refused you, right?
- Hyja. They picked me a new magic wand!

Hermione in front of the mirror, thoughtfully:
- Lush chest can make a beautiful even smart woman ....

Drunk in Well ... Dobby breaks into the office to Malfoy and right in the face of the hostess the owner gives: - Fuck You!
Lucius is shocked: - how do you dare, elf fucked? .. Yes, I am! ..
Dobby: - \u200b\u200bOh, sorry-sorry ... Fuck You ... Sir!

Potion. Draco and Hermione work in a pair. Draco, lazily:
- Uh, Granger ... You are, of course, dirty, but I really want to fuck you ...
The innocent Hermione, of course, blushes, pale - and runs out of the class.
Professor Snape, who was unnoticed, who watched this scene, quietly:
- Mr. Malfoy, if you, to such an extent, insensitive, I can help. Every evening, Granger spends in the library, at the table at the window. Put on the wig, call the potter - and then, you know ...
In the evening Draco, on skouring hand Having embarked on the forehead the zigzag scar and taping the wig, comes to the library and hides behind the rack. Soon Hermione comes there. Draco, loud whisper:
- Hermione! This is me, Harry! I love you for a long time, even longer - I want, and you have to surrender right now!
Hermione, like a real friend:
"Okay, only I want to keep your virginity, well, you understand ... I understand, yes? ..
After sex, Draco breaks up a wig and gloating yells:
- Haha, and I Draco Malfoy!
Hermione also removes a wig:
- ha ha. And I am Professor Snape.

"And even the morning today - and that's kind!" - Waola de Mort thought with longing on the day of his death.

Evening. Mud. Slush. Cemetery. Sad driving deaths are guilty to Lord Voldemort. Voldemort waves a magic wand and says lazily:
"Nott!" Nott take a step forward. "Krucio!" Nott is drawn in flour.
"McNeor". McNews take a step forward. "AVADA KEDAVRA" McNeer falls dead.
"Malfoy". Malfoy falls and starts begging in hysterics with screams: "No, no !!! I don't want, do not !!!"
Voldemort: "- Opa. Malfoy is free. He does not want"

Recently, a new substance has been obtained unlaisted Longbottom, from which no one can wash his hands.

Syl bite sits, all in the bandages, meets the heart:
- Oh, book, letter, what happened?
That reluctant:
- Speed \u200b\u200byesterday to the hollow. I am there: "Y!", I'm from there "y!", I'm there "U-y!", I'm from there "U-y!", I'm there "U-y!", And from there Hogwarts Express! !!

At the lesson of potion:
-Yesley, how to cook a sleeping potion?
- Mix ...
-Wrong! Once again I ask how to cook the potion of sleep?
- I will confuse ...
-Wrong! Last time I ask how to cook a swelling potion?
Yes, I do not know, Professor Snape!
- Easternally, Weasley.

Revied Voldemort in front of the mirror:
-Wow! 70 years old - and not a single haired hairs!

Hagrid:
- I will teach care for magical beings!
Ron, seeing which creatures Hagrid prepared for the lesson:
-And I will teach the buzz from the magic creatures!

Hermione was angry with flywheel time:
- Yesterday was Friday, tomorrow will be Saturday ... Merlin, and today what?