Build a house, plant a tree, grow a son. What does the phrase mean "planted the tree, did the son bore, built a house"? What is a house building

The funniest

Early morning in the village, the usual family mother, son and father without feet,

Early morning in the village, the usual family mother, son and father without feet, who lost in war. The son is going to hunt, takes a gun, the cartridge, here the Bath will lie down and says:
- Son, take me to the hunt, really want!
- Dae, yes, how I'll take you, you have no legs, what is the benefit of you?
- And you set me to the backpack behind your back, and if you suddenly see to the bear, you shoot it - you won't get to him, and I will kill him with one shot, you know myself - I shoot a protein in the eye from 100 meters! So home mining will bring that it will eat in winter.
The son thought-thought and says - Okay, to fight, went.
They go through the forest, the father in the backpack is sitting here and here to meet a bear. The son shoots, does not fall, it shoots again - again the misses, turns his back, the Bath shoots - also waves, again - again - once again. The bear is already on them, well, the son as will give Dera, and the time I scream - they melt faster, catch up! For an hour already, there is no strength, the son understands that they will not run away from Bathi - both will disappear, I decided to reset the backpack and runs further.
Resorts all the stuffed home and says Mother:
- Mother, we have more than my father ... - with tears in the eyes.
Mother calmly puts a frying pan, turns to him and says:
- How did I have with my hunt Zheb @ Lee, then the babe 10 minutes ago on my hands came running, said that there is no more Son!

Called a man at work on corporate party, allowed to come

They called a peasant at work on corporate parties, allowed to come with their wives, the corporate was the themed - Masquerade, it was necessary to come in costumes, with masks. It was said - Made, they already gathered before going out, and his wife had a head, says "Go without me, and I'm still at home" - and herself came up with a tricky plan - to follow a man, how he will behave on Masquerade, pester From accounting or get used at all. Before going out, the costume changed, comes and sees like her hubby - then it dances with one, then another is knots, guard! She decided to check - how much he would go further, invited him to the dance, dancing and whisper to him on the eye: - It can alone ...
They retired, made their affairs, the wife went home quickly. The husband came a little later, she decided to ask him:
Well - what? How do you corporate?!
M - yes boredom gray, we decided to play poker with men, and in front of it, Petrovich, the boss asked for the costumes with him, because he was his dirty, so it was lucky, imagine, some woman in w @ pp Dala!

The girl invited a guy to visit, romantic, all things. A W.

The girl invited a guy to visit, romantic, all things. And at this moment the belly has twisted, it's just no strength to endure. They comes to her in the apartment and the girl says:
- You come in, do not be shy, pass to the room, and I now go to the bathroom - Noska Popper ...
The guy somehow was uncomfortable to ask her ahead, I decided to suffer, although there was no strength. It goes into the room, looks - the dog is big such sitting. I took and dulled in the room, and it thinks that everything will fall on the dog, and the time is pleased to drink tea in the kitchen.
The girl with the bathroom comes out and he asks:
D: What are you not going to the room?
P: Yes, there is a big dog, I'm afraid of her.
D: found someone to scare, she plush ...
P: We needed, but I looked like a real!

Perestroika, collective farms slowly fucked, all gathered

Perestroika, the collective farms slowly fade, all animals in the livestock gathered and discuss their further fate.
The first were bulls, they say: it is necessary to leave here until the hoofs are intact. The roof is already in the hangar, which is not raining, so we swim like ducks. Further, the pigs are: normal feed has not been ate 100 years old, all rotten straw, the water is given every three days. It is impossible to live so much, you need to dump. All other animals supported: yes, yes, enough to endure it and went. One ball is sitting on the spot, he is all asked:
- Ball, what are you sitting?! Come with us!
The ball replies:
- Yes, no, I will not go with you I have a prospect!
Animals:
- What is the prospect? You die here with hunger!
Ball:
- No, guys, I have a prospect here!
Animals:
- Well, what is your prospect, get sick, fluttering and dreaming one here!
Ball:
- Do not guys, I have a prospect ...
Animals:
- What is the prospect?!?!?!
Ball:
- I heard here that the owner said the owner "... if so things go further, then all winter will suck the ball ..."

The son comes up to his father and asks: - Batya, and what is

The son is suitable for his father and asks:
- Bath, and what is a virtual reality?
Daja thinking a little telling her son:
- Son to give you an answer to this question, go to my mother, grandmother and grandfather, but ask them they could sleep with African for 1 million dollars. It is suitable for mom and asks:
- Mom, would you be able to sleep with an African for 1 million dollars?
- Well, son, it's not cunning, and we need money, of course I could!
Further comes to your grandmother with the same question, the grandmother answers him:
- Of course, granddaughter! If I had a million dollars, I would have lived as many years old !!!
It is a quest queue, grandfather replies:
- Well, in fact, it is not considered once, so of course - yes, on this million we would build a house by the sea, but I would finally go from grandmother!
Returns back the son to his father with the results, and his father says:
- Here you see a son, in virtual reality we have three million dollars, and in the real reality - 2 is simple # thenki and one PID @ R # s!

New jokes

One very old man came to the retirement

One very old man came to the retirement to make a pension:
- Sorry, girl, I have to be benefits, I am a veteran of the Kulikovsky battle ...
- Bring a certificate that they participated in it!
- Yes, where do I take such a certificate? It was 700 years ago!
- Oh, I do not know, I do not know! Tatars bring!

Sits calmly a crow on the tree, nothing foreshadowed troubles,

Sitting a calmly crow on the tree, nothing foreshadowed troubles, as he hears from the bottom that shutters, looks, and there is a cow:
- Cow, what did you get out of the mind? Where do you climb?
- I want to eat an apple!
- What are you, fool?! This is birch!
- You yourself are a fool! I have with me!

During the war, one Jew decided to sign up in a detachment, asks for him to be accepted. The commander thought for a long time and says: "Listen, we usually do not take strangers, but for you we will make an exception if you fulfill our task. Take a pack of sheet on the table and distribute them in a busy fascist. The term of the task is three days! Satisfied Jew has gone On the task, there is no his day, no two, a week is not a hearing, no spirit. The commander thinks - Our fighter disappeared, probably ... A month later, the Jew returns, goes to the commander, puts money from his pockets to the command: "Comrade Commander According to your task, I declare - everything is done, there are no longer leaflets, but I ask you very much, do not give me such tasks - the goods are not running, and the police are chasing!

Wonderful Saturday morning wife is preparing the scrambled eggs, unexpectedly

A wonderful Saturday morning a wife is preparing the scrambled eggs, unexpectedly at that moment her husband runs and begins to yell:
- Care! Where are you so little oil? More lei, more! God you are mine who taught you cook?! Why so many eggs at a time decided to fry? Too much! Now turn over! Turn over! Out faster! And now everything will stick and nothing will come! Good! Good! I said you need to do carefully! Always you do not listen to me when you are preparing the scrambled eggs! Did you sleep completely? Who is cooking, who taught you? And salt? Where is the salt?! Use salt and pepper do not forget!
Wife in shock looks at her husband:
- Dear, what's wrong with you? Do you think I can't cook an elementary scrambled eggs?
The husband calmly explains:
- I just wanted to show that I feel at the moments when I lead our car, and you sit next to!

Russian sayings and proverbs carry a deep and very concrete meaning. Consider what is meant in this well-known proverb.

The proverb "planted the tree, bore the son, built a house" - What does it mean?

Russian sayings and proverbs carry a deep and very concrete meaning. Consider what is meant in this well-known proverb.

Build a house

The house is a space that has clear boundaries and structure.In essence, the "house" is a kind of system where various subjects can interact, and where various processes can occur.

In the literal sense, the expression "Build a House" meant to create a safe place for my family, the continuation of the kind, a place to protect, the place where you can gain strength, the place where the focus was burning, the fire in which was lit from the fire of Lightning Perun, and this fire should have been kept Negasim ...

Currentlywhen most people are no longer directly involved in the construction of a place to stay, when with the development of transport and internet everything more people do not see the need for settling and can and want to travel, and the fire in the focus is replaced with electricity, the expression "build a house", however, did not lose meaning.

But his meaning video changes.

Now the "house" is no longer only material."Build a house" means creating a clear and specific structure, system. Often it is a business working as a clock.

Also "House" This can be an organized system of relationship between people.By the way, according to the expression of one of my friend-coach, the proposal of the hand and hearts "structures the relationship between a man and a woman."

The "house" can be called an informational structure, such as works of art.It happens that the invented character gets so bright that it seems to be starting to live an independent life. There is a huge number of copies, imitation, on the principle of genetic replication in biology.

This phenomenon has already been studied from different points of view. And in the artistic literature, for example, in the novels "Portrait of Dorian Gray", "Sleep Blade", "Fog".

Also, the category of "intangible houses" includes such phenomena as fashion and cinema as a whole, as well as such phenomena, such as the MARWEL Universe.

Thus, "build a house" means "to create a system of behavioral reactions, relationships between people and structuring processes occurring in this system."

A rather complicated thing, but the result is worth it.

Give birth

According to the research of genetics, DNA of people on earth is practically similar, differences are about 0, 01%. That is, only one hundredth percent of the genetic information of our body remains to the share of uniqueness. This fact speaks of the meaning of uniqueness.

And then on the topic of genetic information is very interesting. The fact is that the mother transmit genetic information only to their daughters. But men have no information transmitted only from mothers.Moreover, it is from the father's DNA that the health of the child depends.

Well, an interesting point: DNA of any person 40% consists of DNA viruses experienced ancestors. By the way, the virus, acting on the cell, causes it to mutate, and the vast majority of mutations with natural selection are not visibility, and only a small part in essence contributes to evolutionary development.

And these are the same 40%, a sufficiently weighty part of the genetic code, in essence, are encoded experience of the survival of thousands of generations of ancestors.

Dear information, isn't it?

From the foregoing it follows that the expression "give birth to (grow) of the Son" one way or another is associated with the development (evolution) and mean the transfer of hereditary information.

And this small part of the information has value, all the hundreds of percent. After all, from the point of view of nature, it is not the selection of the strongest and best genes, but their unique combination.

In the patriarchal society the theme of inheritance is inextricably linked with the transfer of material values ("Houses" and Nizhny Property and other "structures").

In modern conditions, the situation changes. And it's not only a feminism, who approved the rights of inheritance and other social bonuses for women, but also that with the development of science disappeared the need for two parents to transmit genetic information to human offspring.

In a broad sense, the expression means to leave after itself the heir of material values, the carrier of the genome, leave a unique information trail.

To plant a tree

Tree in Slavs (and not only) is a symbol of kind.And this is again about the system, because the genus consists of men and women who are often not directly related to blood bonds, but connected by the common goals, ideas, values, traditions and rituals, patriotism, cultural and historical past.

Tree branches are younger generation, stretch to the sky and the Sun, while the roots (ancestors) - they have grown to the ground.Ancient Rusichi called the mother's motherland, and in the journey we wore the neck champ with a handful of their native land, as it was believed that they were far from their homeland in this way could be protected.

And now the expression "Mother Cheese Earth", "Earth-Mother". The sky and the Sun associated with male deities. Thus, the tree is not only a family symbol, but also the symbol of the spiritual connection of the male and female began in quite tangible and alive.

If the house is an artificially created material structure, the tree is a living structure born. Little to give birth and grow the Son, it is important to be part of a generic (information) system.It is also important to become a kinderrian, a starting point for a new growth, a bifurcation point.

The tree symbolizes precisely fractality, infinite repeatability of signs in wildlife.

All three parts of the old Russian sayings are interconnected between themselves and mean the importance and value of the manifestation of the creative nature of a person, without the denial of the animal, in combination with nature and the world.

The ability to work is one of those characteristics that distinguish us from animals. The ability to consciously interact with information, creating entire information structures, independent and independent - is it not value?

© Evelina Gaevskaya

P.S. And remember, just changing your consciousness - we will change the world together! © Econet.

- What is the meaning of this definition?

What is the meaning of man's life?

What is needed in order to be happy? Have you tried to answer this question?

There is such a definition: "A person must build a house, plant a tree and raise the Son."

And many of us understand it literally - create a family, children grow. We are inherited from your parents or grandparents, or really build or buy yourself a house or apartment. Cut the cottage or garden, where it is planted and grown, and not one tree. But there are still happening, and very often, unhappy.

What is a house building?

The house is a place where love, kindness, understanding, mercy, help, care, tenderness, joy, happiness are living. The house is the entire space of your life. The house is your homeland. The house is all you are cute and expensive, this is where you are good.

Another home can be called yourself - a house or temple for your soul. That is, first of all, every person must become a house for the soul. So that his soul flourished and singing, and this song of the soul was poured into the world, making it better.

What do we actually do - build body choirs, make renovations, buy expensive carpets, furniture, dishes. But from this our homes are not done better - there is no spiritual heat in them, there is no love. Yes, there is no time for the soul - solid care.

There is something to think about, is it really?

BUT - "to plant a tree"? What is meant by this? Of course, a literal tree. Each of us should take care of nature. Must love her and save. Everyone in the country or garden everyone takes care of their sapling and seedlings, their colors and berries. Trying during them to pour, loose, remove the extra dirt. And in nature, when you go to a picnic or for mushrooms, fishing. Do many of you remove trash behind you? Do many of you extinguish fires on which they were preparing their kebabs? Our forests and parks, and just courtesy territories, turned into a dump of garbage and dirt. And what is the sense of what is on your dacha shines cleanliness, and near your entrance or home garbage and dirt?

But there is also another meaning "to plant a tree". It is possible to give the new generation to grow and become a new tree of life, a tree of life. Your parents are roots, you (family - spouses) - trunk, your children - branches, your grandchildren - twigs, your great-grandfather - leaves. But, every branch and twig, each leaf must grow their tree. So the generic grove grows - genus.

What is "to start a family"? It's not easy, to meet some person, love, play a wedding, give birth to a child, wipe it, give it to raising at first in Nurserie, kindergarten, school, institute, etc. This is a very responsible work, and first of all, with himself. Everyone must find the ways and compromises that will make communication in the family comfortable, calm and joyful, full of spiritual heat and love. Everyone should be very trying to bring up their children intelligent and kind.

What is happening today in fact? There are two young people who do not have the right morality in relation to each other, since all the media today speaks about free relations, not about morality, but about immorality. Young people do not understand and do not know what to love. And there is a so-called in love, sensual relationship. And, these two really want to escape from the care of parents, or someone from two thinks about their benefit (money, apartment, etc.), or just it "last hope" Create a family, or just it happened that the new person will soon have to be born. So created "a family". And today it is even called "Marriage".

And where is love?Where in relations to each other confidence, understanding, kindness, desire to help, tenderness. Usually there are no. There are either affection (habit), or any obligations (the same marriage contract) or "Hold" Small children. But the attitude towards your children is purely everyday - to feed the school in time, to dress, to educate the school, the institute, but not we ourselves, we also spend a lot of money to provide our children textbooks, computer, clothing, food, food ; " so that they do not need anything ", or were "No worse than others."

And where is the love of the child? Not Sysyukanny and Potaking Caprises, not excessive guardianship, namely love?

Exactly mom and dad should be the first educators and teachers. Mom and dad should be the first comrades and friends.

Exactly mom and dad should show your child the world in which he came. It is you should teach your child to love.

But how can you teach to love if you can't know how?

Love is a very deep feeling that needs to be kept in equilibrium.. remember, that "from love to hate one step". Hate comes from disappointment, from unfulfilled hopes.

And what did you do to make all your hopes justify that your dream come true?

Love need to raise. And even just respect or deep attachment can be raised to great love. I tell you for sure. I myself went.

But for this you need to really love yourself and see in your partner, first of all the person who is for what to love.

This is such love remains for many years. It is like in fairy tales: "They lived long and happily and died in one day".

We must try not to change the other person with your own morals, but to change yourself. Understand that the main thing in life is for you and for him. Find compromises, and such, so that you and your second half are calm and comfortable. So that there are no shortcomings in your relationship and even if small, but deceptions. And this is a job for two spouses.

The simplest thing is to say that he (she) himself does not want to change that you are doing so much for a relaxed family life that you are already tired to adapt and give up.

And so many families live. And, children in such families grow by the same - do not know the happiness - not to learn.

Here I am "A person must build a house, plant a tree and raise the Son".

It turns out that each of us must first raise yourself. Understand yourself. Take yourself. Learn to love, learn to give and take love.

It is difficult, but it can do it!

After all, it was for this that we came to this land - learn to love.

And I'm not talking about love about the relationship or feelings for another person, but about the love of the degenidant, unconditional, limitless and clean. This is a love for yourself - as the temple of the soul, it is love for the world in which you live, it is love for people who surround you, it is love for your roots - all your ancestors, it is love for God, as the creator of all and everyone This is a love for a person who is your second half, it is love for your children, continueing you yourself, is the love of everything living and existing.

But how to learn to love?!

Start changing yourself: "Change myself, and the world will change around you!"

This is not just beautiful words. This rule that needs to be performed by each of us if we want to live in the best world.

Photo Gallery: 3 Things to do a real man

So, 3 things that a real man should do. Previously, a man had to build a house. What was meant by this? In fact, the house, then there was an opportunity to protect himself from the cold and attacks of enemies. After all, the house can be called the castle, fortified and protected from all external enemies. Indeed, a strong and good house earlier, very much appreciated because the house was reliable, the person received more opportunities to protect themselves from various weather cataclysms and protects against ill-wishers. In addition, not every person could afford to build a real housing, and not Hibaru, who will fall apart from the light blow of the wind. That is why men always tried to build a real house to get a good bride. After all, at all times, the parents tried to give the daughter to marry the most reliable young man. A strong house was the first proof of his reliability. This meant that the man was able to accumulate funds independently and personally erect his home, which also proved his physical force.

What is the strong and big mansion in the modern world. Well, probably, that a man has financial opportunities to acquire it or hire workers for construction. Now few people will build a house personally. And, if it happens, then it is most likely to say that a person does not have enough money to pay the professional brigade of builders. The construction of the house itself will take more than one year and therefore, in the modern world, a man should rather not build a house, but acquire a presentable dwelling. It is not necessary, there must be a cottage or mansion. Also, as an "home" there is a beautiful spacious apartment in a good area of \u200b\u200bthe city. Probably, the concept of the house, in fact, was still not too much changed from the past times. The bride's parents still cares the living space of the future son-in-law. Only now they are not worried not to raids barbarians and cold winters, and prospects to live in one apartment with young, which, of course, I don't want to rent an apartment at all, which will be not so cheap, which will suffer from the future family budget of their daughter . So, it can be concluded that the first thing that a modern man should make is to get a living space. And let it be a gift, an inheritance or honestly earned apartment, the main thing is that the guy has, where to live with the future wife.

The second is to plant a tree. What was meant by this sometime? Tree, this is, first of all, give birth. And if there is a harvest, it means that in the winter the family will not be hungry. Then, under the planting of the tree, they had in mind that the young man has its lands on which he can and knows how to grow bread, vegetables and fruits. It is no secret that agriculture had previously been one of the main professions. If a man was a good agriculture, he had food in the house, besides, many products went for sale. For the reversed money, the guy had the opportunity to buy clothes, homemade utensils and firewood for the winter, so as not to blame in a cold house.

Then it turns out that for a modern man, put a tree - it means to get a good job. Now, when you can buy almost everything, the main currency was not bread, but money. Yes, and requests for modern people an order of magnitude higher than their ancestors. Therefore, in order to live in the modern world, it is necessary to have enough money, which, as you know, and brings a promising high-paying job. That is why modern guys should not just learn how to handle their land plot well. They need to have a high intelligence and get a good education in high school, with which you can find a suitable job. Also, in order to have high earnings. It is necessary to be ambitious and brave, be able to find non-standard solutions and never give up. So, to some extent, modern men are more difficult to fulfill the second rule.

Well, the third is to grow a son. Probably, this is the only thing that will never change. Everyone wants to continue his genus, see the best qualities in his children, which he laid them from infancy. Of course, times are changing, and methods of education are also becoming somewhat different, but, nevertheless, one is at the heart of a worthy member of society from their child. This is exactly what every real man is trying to make. He will never leave his offspring and will not try to see from obligations. A real man and a real father will raise her child and never say that he simply does not have time. Such men always managed to build houses and raise trees, but, at the same time, their children never remained without male education. Education in such men is strict and fair, and they undoubtedly love their children very much. For the sake of the child, such guys build the most warm and cozy house and grow the highest tree. They make everything they can and even try to accomplish the impossible.

So, 3 things to make a real man in the modern world are to get a good living space, have a highly paid job and to do everything so that his children do not need love, care and proper upbringing. If a man is able to achieve this - he will be able to fully realize in life. But, in fact, to fulfill these three rules is not so easy. It is necessary to apply a lot of effort. Therefore, it is not surprising that not all men achieve such results, and therefore self-realization. But, if your boyfriend has a good home or apartment, work that brings him not only high income, but also joy, and, in addition, he loves children very much and is ready to invest in them the whole soul and all finance means there is really real The man who is worthy of you.

Once upon a time the wise woman came to the sage and asked:
- Oh, the wisest! The sky discovered that it fits my good time to give birth to the heir. I want to grow it with a worthy person, a real man. From father-mothers I know that a genuine man is the one who build a house will plant a tree and grows his son. Help me know myself, and then the son of conveying wisdom - how to do it right.
"All you really have told your mother with my father," the sage replied. - And I'm just more accurate. The house needs to be built on the foundation of twelve bricks. Tree is planted only into suitable land. And your decent son is growing, if you grow a decent mother in yourself.
Woman thought about the words of the sage, and then says:
- You said beautifully, the wisest, but do not understand your words. Explain, please, which means your speech.
Smiled sage and replied:
- The foundation of twelve bricks is a nobility. Twelve letters in this word, and twelve male virtues make it in themselves. This is a solid will, strong faith, honesty, kindness, freedom from the lowland, sense of justice, willingness to help the needy, the ability to respond for their words and affairs, empathy, refusal to condemnation, the ability to forgive and respect the elders. You will help your son to lay this foundation - and it will be firmly standing his heart house, it will not fall fores.
- What is a suitable land and tree?
- A tree is a kind of your who will continue your son. Teach him to look for a decent land - a decent woman. And then the tree of the genus of your forever does not start, and the roots will be fastened.
"Thank you for wisdom," the woman answered it. - I understood what a strong foundation and a suitable land. But what does it mean to grow a decent mother?
"And this is the simplest and most difficult," the sage smiled. - I can give one tip alone. Every day they pray to God with such words: "Lord, help me to be a decent mother for my son! Help me love, and not evaluate it. And help always remember that I gave birth to a son, but I bring up a man! " Did you understand?
"Thank you, the wisest," the woman sighed. "I didn't understand everything, but I can't do one to do so: I asked you about the earthly house, a tree and heir, and you told me that in my soul to raise my child.
"What seeds in the heart of the son of the son will sit in such fruits his earthly affairs and hesitate," the sage answered it.

Oksana Akhmetova, 2013

Many more than once had to hear that a real man should make three things in his life: to build a house, plant a tree and grow a son. The expression has long acquired a shade of popular wisdom, which teaches the man for his life (at least once) should take care of nature, take care of the continuation of a kind, and also provide his family place of residence.

Often this phrase is pronounced during the toast, although to whom it belongs to the authorship of this expression, is unknown. It seems to sound the phrase in the Talmud. It is said that "a person must first build a house and plant a vineyard, and then marry" ("Honeycomb", 44b (93, p.361). So the expression "build a house, plant a tree and grow the Son" can be considered the interpretation of the phrase from Talmuda, the meaning of which is that it is necessary to first create conditions for life, and then get a wife.

Generations of Soviet children, following the young performers, inspired by the rows of a popular song: "Let there be a mother, let them always be." Not everyone asked the question: "What about dad?"

On pickup

More recently, the role in the family was quite clearly distributed: dad works and earn, the mother also works and raises. Although the fathers, of course, are different, but with the word "dad" in Soviet times there were two stereotypes: dad, lying on the sofa with a sports newspaper or strict with the belt. Walked with children, drove them into the sections, mugs, went to the parent meetings most often mom or grandmother. Father was responsible for teaching a child to order, strict upbringing and even the choice of the professional path of the son or daughter.

"Pope becomes more responsible, want to take part in the raising of children. Sometimes women earn more, and the dad are "on the pickup" - help in the upbringing. Fathers are increasingly going to maternity leave. Now I go to the parent meetings to your children and see that dads often come, which are actively discussing all school cases. That is, they are interested in developing children, "said Irina Ermakova, chairman of the public organization" Large Perm Territory ". - We have a forum for women "Mama-bee". While moms received new knowledge, Pope were engaged in children. I think it's great. "

Modern life blurs traditional roles, but it's not so easy to get used to it. About how to be a mother - from pregnancy to upbringing adolescents - you can learn everywhere. But about how to be dad, information is less. The role of the father is usually not prepared: in kindergarten and school, they usually do not say who such dad, focusing on mom.

Now you can see Brutal Unusek, who braid pigtails daughters walk with kids in playgrounds. Pope carry children in the section and circles and generally spend more time with children.

"If you want to be a good dad, no one will tell you how to do it. There are practically no books. Thematic sites are also very few and useful information there a bit, "says the organizer of the discussion" And where is the dad? ", Which took recently at the exhibition" Smart Baby ", Peter Kravchenko.

Mama Ecosystem

Peter has two children: arsenia for three years, Cyril will soon have a year. Separation of roles in the family traditional: dad, mainly minider. Still, Peter tries to spend more time with sons. Now the schedule allows you to take a three-year-old son to work so that the baby knows what the head of the family is doing and how money earns. When Peter began to actively participate in the raising of children, he understood that he did not know much.

"I see how to convege a wife with girlfriends. They have some kind of bird language, a whole mother ecosystem. This is manifested in everything: they are divided by tips, change things, etc. There are many sites and groups in social networks for mothers. And for PAP, there is nothing yet, "says Peter. - It so happened that I and my close friends almost simultaneously became fathers. But in our male company it is not customary to discuss issues of education. But we all wanted to become fathers, and our goal is to become good dads. But unlike women, there are no courses or books for us. Me, for example, interests a lot of questions. On the one hand, I do not want to crush the child with rigor, on the other - I understand that you need to form a framework of behavior. How to find a balance? If earlier dad influenced the choice of profession, now it becomes impossible. When the kid grows, they will change significantly. That's where to look for an answer even to this question? ".

In a male company, it is not customary to discuss issues of education. But we all wanted to become fathers, and our goal is to become good dads. But unlike women, there are no courses or books for us.
Tempered and responsible

To understand who is such a dad and what it means - to be a good father, Peter and his acquaintances organized a discussion. To the joy of the organizers, she gathered a lot of men. How to find a balance between work and family, what is a conscious paternity, what are the advantages of maternity leave - they discussed all these questions.

"The future Father is important to be aware of everything that happens to your beloved woman at the stage of pregnancy. It should be a need, because even not yet born baby is already part of the family. In such a situation, a man is already wondering than he can help. If the husband is responsible for the role of the Father, he should be ready to rebuild taste habits, abandon some personal needs in favor of family needs (for example, quit smoking on the balcony, go out), "says Perm journalist Roman Popov. - The decret goes the one who is more convenient. Here is the issue of priority and agreements, and not established norms. A man still at the pregnancy stage should consider the option that he can go to the decree. Traditionally, all knowledge about what happens to the child is passed to a woman. If a pediatrician comes, he tells all the information about well-being, he tells his mother, and dad only trusts bring a spoon for inspection. However, the father is also important to be aware, he must participate in decision-making and take responsibility. "

According to the novel, a man must forget about the traditional distribution of duties on the house. Separations for men and women are not doing.
Men say that while the dads that are engaged in children are rare, they have a number of bonuses. At a minimum - muming mothers in playgrounds. One dad remembered the ladies in the children's clinic in front of him and his child, because fathers in medical institutions usually appear much less often mothers.

Father must participate in decision making and take responsibility
The organizers of the discussion want to bring the topic of conscious paternity to a new level - they plan to hold the festival of dads in Perm. And in the near future, September 30, will raise this topic at the WE-Fest festival dedicated to family issues.

Why is the law so severe?

Commissioner for the Rights of the child in the Perm region Pavel Mikov:

In the past three to four years, the number of complaints from the fathers of children has increased significantly. Connections are most often associated with disagreement with the decisions of the courts that determined the residence of the child after the divorce of the parents. On the one hand, the very fact of the appeal and the wishes of the fathers participate in the life of children talk about informed parents, and this cannot but rejoice. On the other hand, this testifies to some problems in the practice of Russian proceedings.

Most often, the judge takes the traditional decision for our mentality regarding the place of residence of children, leaving them with his mother. According to fathers, judges are not comprehensively approaching the evaluation of this decision. One of the last appeals to the Commissioner testifies to this.

A man does not agree with the court decision, which determined that after the divorce, one child would live with her mother, the other with dad. However, as it turned out, the mother of children actively professes a non-traditional religion: and such moments as a refusal of traditional medicine, the involvement of the child in the departure of religious cults, changing the normal diet, cannot but cause doubts about the safety of the physical and spiritual development of the child. Now a man challenges the court decision.

Head or friend?

Senior Lecturer of the Department of Psychology of Development PGNIU Maxim Zubakin:

Now the perception of the role of the father in the family is gradually changing. Presentations differ from those who were during our parents. In modern society, there are no uniform ideas about the role of the Father.

In my opinion, interest in raising children and improving the quality of their life while there is a rather small layer of men. As a rule, these are people educated, with an average income, aged 30 to 45 years. There is still no wide request in society to discuss this topic.

A man does not always understand what it means to be a father. The problem lies in the fact that there is a certain conflict between the role of the minister and dad. Usually men work a lot, but the children at home almost do not see them. It is not easy to find the balance to implement in the profession, and find time for children.

Mix both roles - employee and dad - not the best idea, as they suggest completely different behavior. Often, a man gets used to behaving in the enterprise in a certain way and transfers the same style of communication on the family, which causes conflicts. If a man is very structured at work, the family suggests much less formalization. The work obliges to act clearly and is not motionless, while the houses are expecting a greater manifestation of feelings. At work, quite narrow features for the manifestation of their individual characteristics. The family, rather, is forced to take the character of the Father in all its manifestations. If a man suits a certain corporation from the family, he perceives his wife and children as employees of the enterprise, they resist the management and begin to hide something.

Rise yourself, not children

Dean of the Faculty of Legal and Social Pedagogical Education of PGGPU Venus Koroskova:

You can select four categories of fathers. The first is missing parents. They either never participated in the life of the child, or ceased to communicate with him after the divorce. Second - traditional dads. They do not particularly interfere with children. They believe that their task is to earn money, and education is a mother's business. The third category is active dads. They are ready to delve into the educational process, readily communicate with children. The latter and the most small, are authoritarian fathers who regulate all areas of life in the family. They decide everything themselves, and the mother has no voice to vote.

The most numerous category is traditional dads. We usually want them to pay more attention to children, but scold and force - no way out. Schools further exacerbate the situation. When usually dad cause to the teacher? In cases where the child does badly behave. For a man, a child is a reason for pride, and listening to the son of a son or daughter, the dad feel. Now we offer in groups of kindergartens, school classes to organize family clubs to stimulate dad participating in the life of children. Men can participate in campaigns and meetings in nature, can also skewed, and play football with children, see how other couples are communicating - parents of their children.

Active fathers are much less - in different groups from 6 to 15%. With as a hell of the year, this figure increases, as much information appears on the Internet.

I will say that it is important not so much how much dad spends with the child and raises, but how he behaves in the family: as it belongs to the mother's mother, how and how much it works. There is such an English proverb: "Do not bring up children, they will still do what you do." She is true. Father simply shows a child with his example, as in a variety of situations you need to behave.

Protect and teach

Dad on Decrete Sergey Galiullin:

When I learned that we with my wife will be a child, I began to look for a job with a big earnings. But it did not work out, so I decided to be with a child. I think this work, because to bring up a daughter is the same work.

Mom works in our family, and I sit with the child. Household tasks - to wash, stroke, cook, wash the floors - performs one who has time. Usually I am preparing breakfast, my wife is dinner. She most often washes the floors, because I am doing with my daughter at this time. I walk with her, I change diapers, my wife lays her sleep. So as I am with my daughter from birth, we have a good contact. I had to learn to wash the child, changing diapers, clothes. Now she falls asleep with me worse, loves her mother more. But I do not perceive it as a problem.

I believe that men should spend more time with children. Dad can give her daughter and son what Mom will not be able to. Dad is stronger and it is he who will slide a child on his shoulders. Dad is easier to be a clown, a fool, over which children will be kindly laugh. But dad and protect, teach how to defend themselves how to get out of conflict situations. In general, it is very important for me to be a father - to be necessary, caring. I learned to some household things that did not know how to do before. Even cooking is better.

Traditional ideas about the roles in the family lose relevance. But stereotypes change very difficult. It seems to me that the more dads will actively spend time with children, the faster the point of view in society will change. I often see men with strollers on a walk, in stores. First, the dad will learn to just be with the children, and then educate them at the proper level.

Divide and raise

Large mother Nina Shirinkina:

My husband came to maternity leave to maternity leave for the care of the younger daughter. We compared the level of salaries and found out that it would be more profitable. I will say right away that not all familiar and even close people understood us. Nevertheless, I believe that it turned out to be the right decision. We immediately divided the duties that both parents do with the baby and she would equally have enough attention and dads, and moms. I got up to my daughter at night, my husband was with her in the morning and day. In the evening, I always came from work on time to feed her, wash it out and put it. The separation of duties in the upbringing is kept here and now. The husband brings up sons, and I do not interfere in the process. My task is to upbringing girls. The spouse takes all children in the section, plans to summer holidays. We decide all the issues of education together and never interfere with children - we make comments and give advice to each other alone alone. I think that husband and wife should be one team.

When a man is doing a lot of child, they have a very close relationship, he begins to understand the baby as well as mom. With her husband's daughter, just such communication. But with the Son, he did not do so much, is no longer such close contact. We noticed another interesting detail and found a confirmation in the literature - the child's speech develops better when the dad communicates with him. Men have a low voice chamber that positively affects the development of the speech center in children. My daughter is now three years old, and it can already build long offers.

And one more thing: when a man actively participates in the upbringing of the child, his wife looks young and happily.

Papal rights:

To upbringing

Caring for children, their upbringing is the equal right and obligation of moms and dads (Art. 38 of the Constitution of the Russian Federation).
In the case of separate residence of parents, the child has the right to communicate with each of them (paragraph 1 of Art. 55 of the Family Code of the Russian Federation).

Parent, living separately, has the right to participate in the raising of children. The one with whom children live does not have the right to impede this communication if it does not harm the physical and mental health of the child and its moral development (paragraph 1 of Art. 66 of the Family Code of the Russian Federation).

For childcare leave

Father, like other relatives, has the right to go on leave to care for children (Art. 256 of the Labor Code of the Russian Federation).
At the request of the employee, the employer must provide a man with a break in work. Refuse the head is not entitled. Men who are on maternity leave receive benefits. Before reaching the child of the age of one and a half years, his employer pays. The size is 40% of the average earnings.

On maternal capital

A man has the right to receive maternal capital, if he is the only adopter for the second child, which is confirmed by the court decision not earlier than 1.01.2007. Also, if the mother died, she was deprived of parental rights, she committed a crime threatening life and health Her children.

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